Meanwhile, I’m over at Lara Schiffbauer’s blog with a few steps that will improve your financial health.
Then you can have some fun hopping to all the other LLC blogs listed in my sidebar. We have some of the best writers online today as contributing writers to LLC. Don’t miss out!
You’re on, Jenny!
Which Is Better – Giving or Receiving?
A tweet came across my screen the other day from one of my favorite blogs (LeadershipFreak) titled, “It’s Better to Give than Receive” and Other Lies. If that’s not a catchy title, I don’t know what is.
From the cradle, Americans are drilled with lessons on how “giving is a virtue.” Give, give, give…
- Take care of your fellow man.
- If you want friends, you must share.
- Give to the poor, feed the hungry, care for the sick.
There is nothing wrong these lessons. They just aren’t the entire picture.
There is a time to give and a time to receive.
The post I linked to above, by Jesse Lyn Stoner, takes on an issue that I rarely hear people discuss:
Receiving is actually HARDER than giving.
Giving is easier than receiving, but that doesn’t mean it’s always better. Here’s the 9 reasons she gives that receiving is good:
- It reminds you that you’re not in charge
- It keeps you humble
- You allow others the opportunity to feel the pleasure of giving
- You get to experience gratitude
- You develop a realistic self-image
- You create a space for others to shine
- You begin to understand what strength really is
- You become a more well-rounded person
- Your relationships become richer
Life List Club is about being brave enough to reach for your heart’s desire, no matter what it is. You make a “life list” and publicly state that “these things are important to me.” The members of the Life List Club have a varied list, ranging from lofty goals like being a better parent / grandparent / Christian / spouse all the way down to planting a garden.
Some of our goals are about giving to others, but many are about the things that we need to take time for or receive ourselves. Americans aren’t all that hot at receiving and it’s a lesson that takes some practice to learn.
Here’s a little test. How well do you:
- Accept a compliment
- Accept help
- Let someone else lead a project
- Allow someone to care for you when you’re sick.
90% of the people I know are terrible at most of the above.
In the LeadershipFreak post, Lyn makes the observation that it’s not always good to give. Giving when people can help themselves takes away their power and opportunity to grow, and keeps them dependent.
What’s important is knowing when to give and when to receive.
A great example is the flight attendant spiel on an airplane. Do they tell you to help everyone around you first? No. They tell you to put on your own oxygen mask first so you don’t pass out before you start dispensing help to everyone around you. That’s darn good advice.
Like many writers I know, I struggle for balance. It’s been slow going to realize that I need to “fill up my own tank” before I give all my gas to the rest of the cars in my life.
What about you? Do you have a harder time giving or receiving? Do you struggle with balancing all the items on your “To Do List?”
Jenny fills her nights with humor: writing memoir, women’s fiction, chick lit, short stories (and chasing after the newly walking Baby Girl). By day, she provides training and social media marketing for an accounting firm. After 15 years as a corporate software trainer, she’s digging this sit down and write thing.
When she’s not at her blog, More Cowbell, Jenny can be found on Twitter at jhansenwrites and at her group blog, Writers In The Storm. Every Saturday, she writes the Risky Baby Business posts at More Cowbell, a series that focuses on babies, new parents and high-risk pregnancy.
Thank you, Jenny for a giving us a thought-provoking post and, in return, we’re going to give you lots of comment luv!